The Short Straw

Last night I had tons of bad dreams. I’m taking classes again and have a mid term today in early american history. its going to be tough and I want to do well but its going to be extremely difficult to pull off anything better than 85.

I had dreams that i woke up too late, that 3 clocks told different times and the one i trusted told me i was 2 hours late. In another dream I got to the class on time and was about to take the test when I was told by the professor that I couldnt take it… for whatever reason. In that dream I had no idea what was going on and couldnt figure out why everything seemed so out of place. I literally ran my head into a wall and knocked myself out… in the dream.

I woke up after that one and told myself to think positive thoughts, go back to sleep and have a good dream. And I started to do just that.

In the next dream I was playing guitar. I started off with simple things, just goofing around. My fingers gradually started to pick up the pace and soon I was cranking out something beautiful, pouring out of me. It was awesome.

Then it turned out I was playing the guitar for some peoples entertainment… ok I thought that’s pretty cool actually but wait… now I’m not only playing for them, I am some sort of slave and when my song is over I am threatened with physical and sexual assault of some kind. Don’t really know what the fuck was going on there but thankfully I woke up right before I was about to start fighting my way out.

And yesterday was such a good day. Spent the 4th with my family on the lake. Shot off a bunch of fireworks. Took the boat out and sat in the middle of the lake by myself for a few minutes during the sunset. Played with all my nieces and nephews. Then I drove back home to Syracuse and started studying.

I tried to study anyway. Internet was a bit distracting so i thought I would take my books down to my bar, figuring it would be dead. It was mostly dead except for a few major distractions. I wont get into details but damn. Some girls just have a knack at making you feel like a complete loser. 

I was actually able to get a little studying done but by the time I headed home the good vibes I had built up all day had been completely flipped around. Guess bad dreams are to be expected when you go to bed feeling like shit about yourself.

I’ll study more today, perform respectably on the test although I doubt I’m getting an A, come home and… fuck I dont know. I better find something satisfying.